Holy Confusion

Sometimes, God confuses me. Let me back up. Like any mom or partner, I think I know what’s best for my family. I pray for my husband and child to be safe, for good things to come their way, and for them to be happy. That sounds good, doesn’t it?

But the truth is—life doesn’t always play out like that. Kids get hurt. Partners struggle. Dreams don’t always unfold the way we imagined. We pray for success, and sometimes survival feels like the holiest win.

Does that mean God isn’t listening? I don’t think so. If anything, it reminds me of Job—the one who shook his fist at the heavens and asked, “Why?” Job never got a tidy answer. What he got instead was presence. God didn’t cause Job’s pain, but God did show up in it.

Maybe that’s the surprise: God doesn’t hand us a script to follow, but invites us into a bigger story than we ever planned. A story where prayers are answered not always with what we asked for, but with what we didn’t even know we needed.

Sometimes we have to step back, take in the whole picture, and realize that God’s goodness is wider than our own plans. Not easy. Not simple. But surprising. And in those surprises, there’s still joy to be found.

And yes, it’s hard to trust that God knows best. We are small specks in this vast and holy universe—while God holds the whole picture in view. Trusting God doesn’t mean pretending everything is fine or that our prayers are answered exactly as we’d hoped. It means leaning into the mystery, accepting that even when the answer looks different than what we wanted, it might still be an answer wrapped in love.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

When Life Gives You Lemons, You Don’t Always Have to Make Lemonade

A few Sundays ago, I was just about to leave the church when the phone rang. It was that familiar internal tug-of-war: answer or let it go to voicemail. I hesitated for a moment—but only a moment—and picked up. The voice on the other end was soft but urgent. A nurse from Foothills Hospital, calling with a request. She wondered if one of the ministers could possibly come visit a patient. It was a long weekend, the hospital chaplains were off duty, and the social worker wasn’t available. “I drive by your church every day,” she said, “and the signs out front—they always make me smile. So I thought I’d call.” I told her I was just on my way out, but I could pop by in ten minutes. When I arrived, two nurses greeted me with a whole lot of gratitude. But I quickly realized this wasn’t about the patient. It was his wife who needed someone. She was lovely. Heartbreakingly lovely. The kind of person who still says thank you after telling you the worst parts of her life. She sat beside her husban...
Read more

From Empty Pews to Full Hearts: Reflecting on 100 Years of the United Church of Canada

I had a bit of a reality check this week. As I watched CityTV cover the United Church of Canada’s 100th anniversary service at Knox United Church, I heard the anchor proudly announce that over 400 people were in attendance. A beautiful celebration, no doubt—but a small number. In Calgary alone, we currently have 13 United Church congregations. Not long ago, we had 16. A decade earlier, over 20. What happened? Even if every one of our 13 Calgary congregations had 100 active members, that’s 1,300 people in a city of 1.4 million—less than 1% of the population. By contrast, I’ve heard stories of Parkdale’s Sunday School in the early 1960s overflowing with 300 children, and sanctuaries filled with 500 adults every week. Of course, Calgary was a much smaller city back then—around 260,000 people—so that still only represented about 3.8% of the population. Even in our so-called glory days, we were never a majority. And maybe that’s okay. Later that same day, Neil and I made our way to the Cava...
Read more

How Would Jesus Respond to the Chaos in the World Today?

Many of us may feel overwhelmed by the challenges posed by Trump and his team of billionaires, as well as certain economic issues in Canada and various global concerns. However, this current situation provides Christians an opportunity to express their authentic voices and emerge as a powerful force for good.  Here are some solutions, revised from a recent Broadview Magazine article*, on how Jesus might respond to the world today. 1. Be Bold.  Last week, in a touching inaugural prayer service, Rt. Rev. Mariann Budde, the Episcopal bishop of Washington, D.C., reached out to Trump, encouraging him to show compassion for those affected by his policies. This courageous action speaks volumes and will certainly make an impact. For us in faith communities, it reminds us of the importance of engaging with our politicians and advocating for our values. Let’s unite with our friends from various denominations and faiths, as the time when a single church can affect change alone is over!...
Read more